Selos mode

the title speaks for itself, yup, i was consumed by the monster called jealousy. can't blame me though, it's second nature for me. i easily get jealous. but of course this does not concern everybody. the concerned casualties of my jealousy are or were my significant others or loved ones (the past, the present and of course the future to be exact).

jealous you say? i bet you're thinking right now, "why, what happened?" well, it may sound petty to some but for me, well, it's a big deal....

anyway, aishi and i were preparing to go to bed since we have to be up really early in the morning. me, being thursday the next day, i have to be in the office before 8. aishi had to be in the office really early to finish some paperwork. we were cuddling and joking and saying goodnight to kyle in my tummy when out of nowhere, his phone beeped a message. who would text him that late considering it's almost 2 in the morning...

actually i'm not the one to be the first one to grab and check his phone but on that night i didn't know what came over me and i checked the message the same time he did. lo and behold!! what did i see?? the message came from a certain girl named IRIS and the message read: "i'm home na. nyt. (insert smiley face)"

now don't tell me there shouldn't be anything to worry about, but, why would she text him that late when she wasn't with him the night? now tell me, wouldn't it rouse or tickle your suspicion or curiosity why this girl would do such a thing at an ungodly hour? i would understand if they were like out on a gimik-- actually no, i woulnd't understand either... she's his officemate, co-employee, they're not even close and why would this girl do such a thing? i mean, i would understand if she was like part of our barkada and we're all tight. we do text each other that we're all home. but this is different.

partly i'm jealous, partly i'm pissed off at this girl. isn't she aware that aishi is married already and has a family? what she did was really way off...

i truly believe aishi when he said he was the only one in the office last night doing some paperwork and his only company were the night guards in the office. now how come this girl would just text him like that? right? can't blame aishi though for being friendly but some girls really misinterpret his friendly demeanor. they think he's making a pass at them, which i assure them he's NOT.

i don't want to sound like i'm justifying myself here because i'm the wife but, that incident really ticked me off...


whew... oh well. at least i got it all out. come to think of it, it's not really jealousy, it's more of being pissed at one girl's behavior. *big grin*

My blog's new look

check it out!! can't believe that i was able to revamp by blog and make it look this good. hahaha

all it takes is a little perseverance and a lot of common sense... with some help from my fellow blogger, Zeus super thank you for helping me sort it out.

i just love the background of my blog!!!

next on the agenda, tag boards and some pictures...

*yey*

Jitters...

Delivery Jitters

as much as i want to condition myself that all will be well when i deliver this happy bundle of joy incubating inside my belly, i'm still fearful of the "what ifs". i've only got three months to go before kyle leaves my tummy and he would leave an empty void literally inside me. i've read in some books that the bond that the mother and the baby shares while he/she is inside the womb is a whole lot different with the bond when you're face to face with your own flesh and blood. there's this big difference that you're protecting someone so precious inside you, but once he/she is out into the world, the control diminishes or changes for that matter. you have to compete already with the environment that surrounds the both of you. honestly, i'm scared to let go of the feeling that there's a growing baby in my tummy. but of course, a baby can't grow inside forever...

on with the delivery jitters since i got sidetracked with the mommy emotion. yup. i'm scared, shitting out of my pants on how my delivery will go. i'm totally praying for a normal delivery. i would rather go through the agonizing pain down there and screaming my lungs out than having someone cut me up like lechon prepared for the feast. (yeah, i know, morbid). i would rather experience tha pain of feeling like something is being ripped apart, well that's true actually. but i would rather go through that pain since the healing process would ba normal compared with being cut up and having a permanent scar just above your pubes. i'm honestly scared of sharp objects...

another worry would be what happens after the delivery? here comes the never ending questions... will i carry kyle the proper way once the doctor hands him to me? will he latch on for his first feeding? will i get to see him open his eyes? will aish be there to see him for the first time as well? will my parents and in laws fight over who gets to see the baby first? what will my brothers feel when they see kyle? so many questions... not that many answers.

Kyle's baptism

it's never too early to start planning kyle's baptism. i want him baptized after a month after his birth. i still haven't started on planning this event. but for sure, we got the church already, we're going to have him baptised in Mary the Queen, the church just beside aishi's school. i just have to ask my friend Karlo how much he paid the church to have his son baptized. but my biggest worry is the after party. for sure we're going to hold it in aishi's house coz it can hold a lot of people. my only worry is how many people are we supposed to invite? and of course, the food.

Our 2006 Wedding Plans

i just don't know where to start... hahahahaha

it feels like all the money's going out and nothing is coming in!!! when will we have enough money to save up for our future and our sons' future? i'm not yet in my 30's or 40's and i'm stressed out like this!! i just want to scream at the top of my lungs!!

is this how a quarter-life crisis feels like?

Help! I want to revamp my blog!

is there anyone out there who can help me make my blog look good? i only know the basics in HTML, but this is really way out of my league and honestly i just don't know where to start.

* i want to change my blog's font colors but it seems, the option for that had been deleted from blogger. (ehem ehem to the blogger people out there)

* is there any easy way to post pictures? i've got so many photo album accounts that i find very tiring to create another one just to upload the same pictures...

*big sigh*

anybody out there... help?

Kylekyle kulit!

my baby boy is 25 weeks in my tummy today and he's one active kid! he tumbles and turns, kicks and punches. the only time that he's awfully quiet is when he's done feeding, if we're off to bed or if he hears his dada's voice checking up on him.

this baby is one tough cookie. when he kicks, he KICKS! i've got a little Bruce Lee growing inside me. haha.

but what i find funny and ticklish at the same time is when he changes his position. i would really feel how big he is already and where he's going to shift his position. one time he's going to stay on my left side, the next on my right, the next right smack in the middle of my belly. his movements feel like a little rollercoaster inside my belly.

the first time my dad saw kyle's movements inside my tummy he got freaked out. i mean i can't blame him. it's not everyday that you see someone's tummy rumble, make waves or bulge just like that. and his funny remark was "naku, baka alien na ang nasa loob nyan" of course, referring to the Aliens movie.. hahaha dada. =D

i'm super excited to be on my 7th month because that's the time aishi and i will go for another ultrasound to go check up on kyle and see who he looks like and if he's a healthy baby boy (and if the first ultrasound WAS right that he IS a BOY). we're also excited to start buying kyle's things after the ultrasound. aishi is in charge of buying the crib and stroller and it's up to me and mama to buy his clothes and diapers and other things (pillows, bib, bedsheets, pillow cases etc). we're also hoping that some of kyle's things would be given to him as presents if ever my friends would plan to push through with the baby shower. that would truly be a great help to us.

i'm just sooo overflowing with excitement in seeing my baby in 3 month's time. on april 22, i'm officialy 6 months to term and this would be the last month of enjoying my pregnant life. the last trimester is really crucial and i have to take extra care from then on. that's where premature labor can come in and i want to give birth to full term. and enjoy the 2 months leave that i get paid for. hahaha

on a bored wednesday...

i don't know what's wrong. is it the office environment or is it just me? this is one boring wednesday and it's not even lunch time. i guess this is one of those days where i can really feel being burned out from work...

why then do i feel burned out?
this is one of those days where i realize that my work is going nowhere and turning into a routine. this is a real pet peeve for me when it comes to work.. i want a work that would really keep me on my toes and really drain out all the juices of my brain. it's really hard when you have already saturated the industry and there's no movement with your contacts. as much as you try to convince them, you don't have any control on where things would go. there will be moments where everything is going well and running smooth and in a snap, a client backs out...just.like.that. and it's frustrating. plus the burden of your boss' expection. you can't help but feel pressured and sorry for yourself. you end up blaming yourself. the what ifs, the why didn't i, the i should've... but this is really beyond your control. and they cycle just goes on and on...

Which Little Prince Character Are you?

You are the little prince.

Saint Exupery's 'The Little Prince' Quiz.
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