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Friday, April 21, 2006

pillow talk

two nights ago, aishi and i were lying in our bed after putting kyle to sleep. out of nowhere, i asked him a question that had bothered me for quite a while but i tend to brush off. i guess in the "fear" that he might take offense on what i'm going to ask him.

but feeling that this was the right place and the right time, i grabbed the chance: i asked him: "bear, kailan tayo huling lumabas na tayong dalawa lang, as in date?" i kept quiet, waiting for him to reply. it took a while for him to answer as he was also thinking about it. and finally he did, "nung anniv natin nung december, yung world pyro pa" sigh "grabe bear, ganun na pala ka-tagal yun"

grabe, it has been a long time. i missed our dates, our dinner out together, our little "us" time. as much as we want to go out on dates (tipong bf/gf pa) it's a bit of a hassle since we would prefer to bring kyle along. to let him enjoy going out at a young age and of course bond with me and his dada.

i even joked since we were on the topic of "quality time", i missed his little surprises and texts our of the blue. but i understand now, that since we are usually swamped with work and our usual textmates are clients, it's really hard to text out of the blue. the only consistent text we get from each other if we're done having lunch and how's work so far. we live such boring lives... hassle talaga ang work! haha

and before the two of us would doze off to sleep, i told him, i sure hope one day,we could go out again, just the two of us. dinner, movie, whatever. i somehow miss our little kilig moments. and he assured me with a goodnight kiss...

3 comments:

MrsPartyGirl said...

sigh. having a baby (indeed) changes a lot of things. if it helps sis, you are not alone. kami din ni hubby ganyan, the last time we went to see a movie together was 2004! pagkatapos ng movie, uwi din kagad kami kasi worried pa rin kami about leaving the baby at home (for the 1st time) with my mom. before that, the last date that we had was our 1st wedding anniversary in 2003. now that i think about all this, para tuloy gusto kong ma-depress, hahaha.

pero, really, the culprit here is familiarity. sometimes, we just fall into this comfortable zone and we sort of mistake the "being together all the time" as "we time" when in fact dapat hindi yun counted. lagi nating naririnig na we should not forget to put a bit of spice in the marriage now and then. and i agree. it's those special dates that you look forward to, yung tatakas from baby (aminin!), yung holding hands without a baby bag on your shoulder or the other hand pushing a stroller, or yung just enjoying dinner without having to cut the meat into very very small pieces. :D

at least you and your hubby are open about discussing things like these. it's very healthy. and i adore your hubby for being the sweetie that he is. sabihin mo yan sa kanya :D

Anonymous said...

i couldn't agree more with mrspartygirl (actually, appropriate din yung screen name nya sakin..haha:P).
i totally understand your predicament. if you and your husband are in the same page, you shouldn't be hesitant on bringing up issues like this. i'm pretty sure your hubby will understand that it's not the drama queen that's talking, it's his wife who wants the best for their marriage. besides, if you feel anything "weird" in your relationship, you shouldn't stall bringing it up to him. it saves time, it saves you from being stressed out thinking about it every night and, most importantly, it saves your marriage...pronto!
i understand where you're coming from. lalo na now that we don't have maid. ken and i haven't gone out since i came back from the states. and we know kasi that we have responsibilities we cant just pass on to in-laws *wink wink*. but even when we have help, there are "dry" days/weeks/months. i guess, it's normal. it's not really letting the flame die down. it's just that as we grow older, our priorities change. but that does not mean we dismiss our "obligations" to our spouses. it's just that when we have kids, there's like two different desires tugging your heart; (1) alone time with your spouse, and simultaneously (2) wishing you could be with your kid/s alll the time. lalo na when you and your hubby are both working. i dunno if there's one way really to solve this matter because no matter how you promise yourself (and your partner) to spend more time with him/her, time's just now a luxury we can always spend. what i do? well, first, ken and i do make sure we get to go out. kahit hindi alone alone...but yeah, no kids. sometimes with his friends or with my friends. just to relive the atmosphere when we were bf-gf. if we're not fortunate enough to have that, we do have a lot of talk time. effortlessly. yun bang hindi planned. it comes naturally. which is something i really thank god for kasi diba usually guys hate staying up late for talking. it's sleep time vs. talk time. i'm super blessed that ken really puts in his share of keeping things new, so to speak. or sometimes naman, we watch dvd's. stuff we've missed in the theaters. tapos after we smoke and analyze the film together.
it's conversations that make the relationship alive, the dates, etc are just spices. aha...ang haba na. i guess ill blog about this. hahaha:) hintayin mo soon!!! ill orgaize my thoughts:) ill site your entry as reference..hihihi:D do you mind?

Anonymous said...

***typo: should be time is noT just a luxury we can spend